Sunday, November 3, 2013

Forever Home

Sometimes life hands you difficult situations and you can either pout and do nothing or you can break down the walls and power through it. I have never felt so proud of the commitment my husband and I have had to powering through these challenges. He has been my rock in so many hard spots and while some days are hard and I'm sure many others will as well. I know now that there is a plan for us and that plan is to help out children in need first. Over the last 12 weeks we have absorbed so much information I feel like my head might explode, but now we are just so anxious to be a forever home to children in need.

I can't express enough how much we appreciate everyone's love and support through this all. It has been a very overwhelming process. We are now just getting to the point where we are thinking man we might be mom and dad in a few months for all we know. Everyone has helped us out in so many ways and it seems like Thank You is just not enough. I don't know how I will repay you all for the  help and support through this but just know the Heidemann family loves you all so much.

I just wanted to put some funny things out there that I never would have thought I would have encountered in this process. I always see the articles out there about things not to ask adoptive parents and just laugh at some of the things people are asked. I never thought I would ever be asked any of these at least not in this stage, but oh was I wrong. I thought I would just list a few to give everyone a small laugh for this Sunday Funday.

1. Will you get to pick your child out of a catalog?
- Say what? This one I had to stop and think for a minute on how to respond. While I understand not many are educated in the process of adoption but please don't ask adoptive parents this.

2. So adopting is like buying a house, you have a realtor and they just send you a bunch of matches that they think you'll like?
- another one I couldn't stop laughing at...not because of the intent of the question but just how funny it sounded to have someone compare adoption to a house.

3. Why do adoptive parents need 6-8 weeks off of work?
- while we do not birth the child and yes that time for some is recover from child birth a lot of that time is for bonding and adjustment. I feel any person bringing a new child into the home birth or adoption deserves this time.

4. They wont be "yours".
- Like hell they wont. Once a child is legally adopted they are issued a new birth it will be certain the child or children will be Heidemann's.

5. Adopting is always a persons second choice and typically only if they can't have their own.
- while my struggles with getting pregnant led us to this journey first it has always been something I have wanted to do whether I birthed a child first or not. There are many people who adopt not just because of issues getting pregnant.

Those are just the ones I have encountered to know, but I'm sure there will be more. While I try not to take these offensively sometimes they do come off rude. I do understand though that many people are just not educated on how the process works and I will always be an advocate to adoption and foster care and I am always open to answering any questions people have whether they want to adopt or foster at all. Just know that there are so many children out there waiting for a forever home and while for some this is just not possibly for some it just hasn't been explored. It is National Adoption Month so I encourage everyone to think about and pray for all those kids out there and hope they do get that forever home.

Lots of Love